🌹 a flower for everyone not feeling their best today

I hope you’re doing well 💕

I hope you’re doing well 💕

i hope the same for you, my friend ❤️







reflecting on my own battles with depression and the like and my own experiences, especially in the wake of the suicide of one of my heroes, and honestly for me, i can’t ever remember a time when i was suicidal in the way we usually talk about it. like, i’ve never thought “i want to die, i want to kill myself.” but i can think of so many times where i thought about how much easier it would be to just never have existed, or to just cease existing. and idk if that means i’m suicidal??? like, i’ve never wanted to die, per se, but i have wished i could just cease existing altogether. does that make any sense?

idk. idk. trying to figure out my own feelings is weird. self-reflection is weird and hard and i hate it but i feel like it’s important to deal with my own shit. 

i don’t like to think of these matters in terms of what does or doesn’t qualify, because really none of it is optimal. i think some things may be more commonly relatable, like not wanting to exist (because aside from any personal matters, as it is there’s a lotta bullshit that is just overwhelming). if you ever feel that way it really doesn’t hurt to have a chat with someone. it doesn’t have to be about that, but something to reconnect you to those you value and who value you.

while i don’t want anyone to feel like they aren’t worthy of concern or that their problems are any less than, i do think there’s a fairly large difference between not wanting to exist and wanting to take your own life. having been through ideation myself i get where that mentality can come from and go, and that it’s not always the same for everyone.

not wanting to exist can snowball into suicidal ideation which is why i say dont hesitate to talk to someone because if you ignore it it will grow and can sneak up on you when you least expect and/or when new stressors come into play. you never really know what life is going to throw at you or how you will react so it is better to be safe than not.

regardless if you have ever had ideation or not, again, don’t hesitate to reach out to someone, ideally someone you trust and feel comfortable with bc you will get the most out of that cycle of energy. im no expert by any means, just thought I’d share my bit.

it is hard and weird and uncomfortable and complicated figuring your own shit out but it’s worth it because absolutely nobody else can tell you who you are. 💜

i totally understand what you’re saying so please don’t to worry about making me (or anyone) feel like they’re not worthy of concern, i get what you’re saying! and honestly you’re expressing exactly what i was feeling and didn’t know how to word, that there’s definitely a gap between not wanting to exist and actually wanting to die but that there’s still a connection, sort of like those feelings exist on a spectrum. and your response really does help me sort of make the links and recognize the differences between my own thoughts and the experience of being suicidal so thank you!!! 

hoebutmadefashion: fishcustardandclintbarton: …




just say elon musk and go

Study shows Millennial Men do not think of wom…





A majority of millennial men failed to see women as equals, according to the study, which looked at how college biology students viewed their classmates’ intelligence and achievements, the Harvard Business Review reported.

Among the findings:

  • In every biology class surveyed, a man was seen as the most celebrated student, even in instances where women earned significantly better grades.
  • Men were also found to overestimate the intelligence of their male classmates over that of female ones.
  • Men continued exaggerating their assessments of the male peers, despite unequivocal evidence that their female peers were performing better.
  • Women, conversely, weren’t found to display a bias: Their assessments of fellow classmates tended to be spot-on.

The National Institutes of Health researchers pointed out that female STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics) majors drop out at significantly higher rates than their male counterparts.

“The reasons for this difference are complex, and one possible contributing factor is the social environment women experience in the classroom,” they wrote.

Still, scores of men are under the impression that they’ve become the target of reverse sexism. Conservative columnist John Hawkins ranted in Town Hall last year:

“Men have it rougher in America than most people realize. In part, that’s because they’re one of the few groups (along with white people, conservatives, and Christians) it’s cool to crap on at every opportunity. In case you haven’t noticed, there’s a nonstop assault on masculinity in America.”

But research has confirmed the reality of gender bias against women. A staggering 90 percent of women reported experiencing gender harassment in the workplace, a 2010 University of Michigan study found. The results suggest that such harassment had the purpose of driving women out of jobs and not the generally assumed motivation of trying to draw women into relationships.

“One could argue that, in these instances, ‘sexual harassment is used both to police and discipline the gender outlaw: the woman who dares to do a man’s job is made to pay,’” the researchers wrote, quoting an article by Katherine M. Franke, an associate professor of law at the University of Arizona College of Law.

As for millennial men specifically, they have been less accepting of female leaders than their older male counterparts, according to a 2014 survey of more than 2,000 adults residing in the United States, the Harvard Business Review reports.

Half of Millenial men said their careers would take priority over their partners’. 

Three-fourths of women, on the other hand, said their careers would be at least as important as their husbands’.

oh look its the shit women have been saying all the damn time and antifeminists stamp their feet and cry about


Scientific studies confirming these issues aren’t new or rare yet said issues are still denied most fiercely by people who claim to just be “logical.”

quelle surprise



Human Rights Campaign National Dinner



I get so annoyed when people are like “we don’t need to be teaching sex ed to kids and teens who aren’t having sex” then why are we making kids and teens do fire drills and lockdown drills if no emergencies are happening???? because when the time comes they’ll know what to do to stay safe you stupid onion peel




I think one of my least favorite types of responses to people speaking up on sexual harassment and sexual assault is are articles like “in wake of weinstein, men wonder if hugging women still ok”, and comments like “this is why men don’t pursue women anymore”, “i don’t wanna work with women cause i don’t want a lawsuit”, or “i don’t even look at women anymore cause everything is sexual harassment”. this is a particular brand of rape culture, men acting as if women are overreacting, as if men don’t have the basic social skills to know the difference between wanted and unwanted advances, as if women simply setting boundaries is “cramping their style” and “emasculating” them, as if the rules of respecting women are super confusing, so confusing that they’re supposedly forcing men not to interact with us altogether.

this is an act they’ve been putting on for decades: playing stupid, pretending not to know better and then getting upset when we tell them what “better” is. if that doesn’t show you how emotional and emotionally manipulative they are, i don’t know what does.





I love Gordon Ramsay so much.

He comes from a very poor family. His father was an alcoholic who beat him and his mother (he once poured hot tea over her and put her in hospital several times), his brother is a drug addict, he literally built an empire out of nothing.

He credits his mother as his biggest inspiration and often has her cooking in his shows.

When he left his first restaurant he pulled a successful Jerry Maguire

– the entire kitchen staff went with him. That tells you what he’s like to work with.

He was one of the first to give a restaurant to a female chef.


He went to prison (Gordon Behind Bars) and taught inmates to bake and they opened a bakery (Bad Boys Bakery) that is still running. He hired one of them when he got out.


He did documentaries about the cruelty of shark hunting and cocaine. (when he discovered cocaine was used by his staff he didn’t fire anyone but made sure they are offered treatment)

His kids are a treasure.

He is always ALWAYS kind to servers.

When one of his partners (Marcus Wareing) wanted to leave they got into a fight and settled it in court, they no longer speak to each other but this is what Marcus said about him after the fight: 


I feel bad that the first association to him for a lot of people is this shouty TV chef when he’s truly a wonderful person. 

Oh and then there’s this:


this entire episode 

never forget that the reason he’s “shouty and angry” on his tv show is that he’s yelling at people who ignore the rules of courtesy and food safety and basically feed their customers poison, something which would enrage any good person

Uncle Gordon

There was a young (I think he was only 19) contestant on MasterChef in 2017 (Gabriel Lewis) who showed REMARKABLE natural ability; he’d been working in fast food restaurants to help support his family (both his parents were ill, and his mom actually recently passed away from cancer), but his skill was way beyond the level of what you’d expect and the judges were amazed by what he could do with very little training and while still being pretty much a child. 

Gabe got tripped up one episode and ended up being eliminated, but after he revealed that Gabe would be leaving, Chef Ramsay then offered to personally finance his full culinary school tuition AND to help support his family financially, and Aaron Sanchez, another judge, offered him a job at one of his restaurants upon his graduation from culinary school.